Monday Mania! (All sensitivities please get checked in my coat closet please! Oh…..and don’t forget your claim check…I may have a few stray sensitivities laying around 😂)

I don’t know about you friends, but I HATE MONDAY’S! Monday and I have a fairly long relationship. I’ve had to get over the fact that Monday will NEVER commit to just me. Monday ALWAYS enjoys starting my week with some f-bomb inciting bang. Monday never asks me or my friends out for a movie or drinks like Friday does. (Shhhhh for heavens sakes PLEASE don’t tell Monday I’m going out with Friday or Saturday, I will have to spend all day Sunday praying Monday will forgive me!) 

I have tried many, many ways to make amends with Monday. I have never been quite clear what it is that I have done that makes Monday so mad. (Maybe Monday should reconsider having relationships with HOW many other people on this planet every seven days??)

I’ve made many promises to Monday. Monday NEVER forgives. I’ve decided I would be the one to start the conversation and strive for happiness and optimism. I think I actually heard Monday laugh. 

I even told Monday I would be happy to buy coffee and share my love of cute chihuahua’s with it. 

Then I heard Monday’s response. 

Now, let me say two things: 1) RUDE and 2) SERIOUSLY??? Ok Monday. I see how it is. It’s ON now Monday. 

Maybe someone should have warned Monday that I can be a bit crazy too! My ADD, OCD, PTSD, WTF, IDC, FML, and Kiss My A$$ disorders may all have just kicked in at once! Oh, Monday. Fear the wrath of a woman with many, many………SQUIRRELS! 

All of you who also hate Monday’s I am quite sure are feeling my pain. Really, Monday, again?!?! Can’t you find a new game? A new place and time? Anywhere but near me? 

Ok, Monday. You have forced me to turn this into a humor post. Oh yeah, you asked for it now! Suck on this Monday! 

Yeah, he steps in it, it lands ON MY FACE! 

Well, since you asked………..

But since I know it will be a cold day in Hell before THAT happens………

Yup, I knew it. There is no cure. So, let’s laugh at Monday instead. (Hope you checked those sensitivities in my closet………sometimes I see the liberal use of the f-bomb, and I find it funny….but I didn’t make it up. I’m just sharing the giggle!) 

I’m so sorry to tell you it isn’t, but I’m just warming up the laughs! 

Nope, I have a whole different Friday face. Maybe I could use my Sunday face to scare off Monday. Sunday….squirrel…same difference right?!?!

Just getting warmed up on ushering Monday out the door! Starbucks! Cures everything! Sometimes it makes Monday’s better too……sometimes. 

Mmmmm…..I just LOVE Monday’s soul! 

Maybe I should be kinder to Monday. We do have this off and on relationship. Except last time I tried to go out with Monday I woke up saying……

Well my friends, I hope your relationship with Monday is better than mine. After all we are all sharing Monday. (Doesn’t THAT just make you wanna wash in Clorox?) I’m sure you all are trying to get back to work. I would be heading that way but………..

Oh wait, I forgot….I live at the beach. Ok, let me try again…….

No? Ok well maybe my real problem with Monday is this………

Well, maybe we are getting closer……

Ohhhhh, sorry…….my squirrels went on a random Monday tangent. Guess they are warming up! So maybe we get closer to the truth with…….

Yikes! Monday AND my Guardian Angel may have ratted me out. 

Ok, I think it’s about time for me to WRAP this up. After all, tomorrow is another day…….of people waiting to make me and you giggle! 

Don’t worry Monday if my plan A fails…

And……….

On that note, a short story and then I’m off to go write reviews (are you afraid for the authors haha)……….

And in the spirit of Halloween….my favorite month……

Now I am off to combat my Monday, and I hope yours is filled with giggles and laughter because we all know……..

And we all knew Monday was coming. No way for Monday to be sneaky……….

And I’m out…….

And should you have forgotten to check your sensitivities and got mad at me on this fine Monday……..

Until next time……..keep laughing my friends!

~J